GALAXY'S CHILD Okay, here we go. First F of the season. First the good points: 1) I liked seeing Geordi chew out Leah on the Holodeck, just to see him get mad for a change. Too bad the script was so pitiful. 2) I liked the line where Leah said "I love !" and Geordi responded something like "Really?" 3) It had a plot. (Hey, that's more than SOME 'F' TNG episodes have had!) That about covers it. Now for the bad points: Oh PUH-LEEZE! Not another "we must not kill other life forms - we are here to make peaceful contact" schtick! This has to be one of the more contrived ones I've seen, especially Picard's lines. This is the man who went around zapping mind-munchers in "Conspiracy"? He was attacking your SHIP for God's sake! You have the right to survive, too! Does the man have a martyr complex, or what? (Doesn't seem likely.) The mother space-slug dies from minimal power phasers and the baby doesn't? Uh-huh. Okay, so the baby decides the Enterprise is its mommy. Yep. I'd say that wins the award for corniest idea of the season. Well, runner-up at least. And I could have done without the implication-made-explicit that the ship's power is its "milk" either. That's just an excuse to come up with lots of cutesy lines, which were generally not appreciated from this corner. Okay, let's see hands: When the baby was attached to the ship and draining its power, how many people were shouting out "TURN OFF THE DAMNED ENGINES"? I know I was. Lots of mug-shots of Troi when something good happens to the baby, and the interminable line "Come on... you can do it!" Yee-uggh. "Booby Trap" redux points: Energy drain; high radiation levels; Leah Brahms. Have we seen all this before? We lot of it, yeah. Did everyone else guess that Leah would be a bitch before she showed up? (She's cute, though.) Guessing that she'd be married wasn't too tough, either. The dinner scene was almost beyond withstanding. Meagre attempts at comic relief, bad dialogue. What less could one ask for? Of course, the episode was filled with poor dialogue: Picard: "Nothing, Lieutenant. Do nothing." (Arrgh!) Geordi: "You remember, we modified [the dilithium crystals] to [do such-and- such]." Leah: "Remember? Why should I remember?" Geordi: "I made a mistake: I was friendly to you." And, of course, in the end they (don't quite) kiss and make up in order to solve the ship's problem (the mushing together of which with the Geordi story brings to mind a phrase of Roger Tang's which he applied to "Hollow Pursuits": Tacked-On Menace. Maybe not perfectly applicable here, but the mating certainly didn't seem natural, as it did in "Booby Trap" (double entendre intended)). Have we seen THIS before? Yep, though perhaps not quite so unsubtly portrayed. I think that mostly covers it. I'm sure if I tried hard, I could find more about the episode to slam. All in all, it was pretty much a complete loss. I think the season has hit rock bottom. Even "The Loss" was better than this... (Gosh, it's nice to be able to cut loose without any shame! Of course, it's much more fun to be able to lavish praise on an episode like "Remember Me" or "Family"; largely because I get to enjoy the episode, too!) Grade: F SEASON FOUR TO DATE: The Best Of Both Worlds Part Two: C- Family: A- Brothers: B Suddenly Human: C Remember Me: A+ Legacy: D+ Reunion: B Future Imperfect: D- Final Mission: B The Loss: D- Data's Day: B- The Wounded: C- Devil's Due: C- Clues: B First Contact: C+ Galaxy's Child: F --- Total Points: 34 2/3 Average: 2.167 = C+ (Fall of 0.144 from previous episode)